The broken hearted girl

This song reminds me of my painful childhood; it brings to memory things that I wish I could forget. The vivid images are gone; but, the scars have not fully healed. I believed I was okay, until I heard this song. This song brings tears to my eyes, not because of what happened, but because of the lyrics. This songs brings the memory back, but in a new way.  This song reminds me that no matter how horrible the situation,God is with me. He is able to restore my break heart, my broken life and my broken memories.  I know I continue to heal daily, but this song takes me back to that place for some reason. Maybe to remind me that I can’t heal myself or maybe to remind me of my purpose. Whatever the reason I am open to it. I know you’re  thinking, why listen to the song. I listen to this song because it breaths hope into my atmosphere. I was broken, I was violated and left to spiritually, mentally and emotionally die. And for a long time I was dead only pretending to be alive. But now I know who lives in me I can truely face tomorrow. God is my restoration. god is my rock, he is my restoration and He is the only one who was there for me when everyone else left. For that I am grateful.


Feeling like a Million..

I feel so good today, God is awesome. This song sums up the feeling I have today. Church was incrediable, the spirit was high and I was high off God’s presence. The way I feel has nothing to do with a man like this song suggest; but the energy of this song says it all. I hope this feeling is contagious. Feel it, feel it, feel it!!!!! RIP Aunt Whitney, we love you.

The wakening of love

marquitaEveryday is a new day for me, I’m been through some trails in my life that would break the strongest person. They almost broke me, they crippled me in so many ways. Life has been unkind, cruel and downright nasty to me at times. Life planted seeds in me that made me resentful to ever be alive at times. I never learned how to love, talking about real love. Not the kind of love you see on television. Not the movies version of love, I’m talking about real life love. The kind that will take you though hills and valleys. The kind of love that makes you want to hurt them but you love them to much to do that. The kind of love that is dedicated to the other person no matter what. The bible tells us in 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 that

“4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.Love never fails.”

Love really is all these things. I thought I knew what love really meant; I thought the bible’s definition was enough to understand love attributes. It gives a picture but my learning style is by example. I learn by seeing and then doing. It wasn’t until my sister and her husband’s situation came to light that I really understood the meaning of love. I won’t go into detail, but I will say that I have learned that love is all the things that the bible mentioned above and so much more. Love is dedication, Love is not always about feelings, love really does suffer long and continues to be kind. Love is planted in the hearts of everyone of us if we allow it to grow. God has given us the capacity to expand beyond our understanding if we are observant of our lives and the lives of others. We have the ability to stretch and not break. This type of stretching builds us into the people we are meant to be. This stretching gives us substance, it gives us wisdom, it give us freedom if we allow ourselves to pay attention to live and love; and to God.My sister has no idea of the lessons she has taught me. I never tell her, but today I am telling the world. I respect this woman for her courage, for her dedication, for her journey. The journey may be different, but the destination is the same as it concerns love. Thank you Marquita for allowing me into you life to witness what true love looks like. I love you more than you know.